My Boss is Dangerous

Today's topic: Things that are "dangerous"

Me: Today we will discuss things that are dangerous.
Student: Okay. I like this topic.
Me: Oh, good! I'm happy you like it. So, can you name some things that you think are dangerous?
Student: Yes. I think life is dangerous.
Me: Life is dangerous? Why do you think that life is dangerous?
Student: You know.... because anything can happen.
Me: That is true. There are dangerous things in life sometimes. What about life do you consider dangerous?
Student: Well, you know... I think that worrying is dangerous.
Me: Worrying? Why do you think worrying is dangerous?
Student: Well, you can worry a lot and it will kill your life. And if you are killed, that is dangerous.
Me: .......  Yes, you're right. It is dangerous to be killed.
Student: Yes. Because if you are killed, then that means that you are not alive anymore.
Me: Right...... So, can you think of any other things that are dangerous?
Student: My boss.
Me: Your boss?
Student: (Laughs nervously) Yes. My boss is very dangerous.
Me: Uh oh. Really? How is he dangerous? Do I want to know?
Student: I should not tell you. But, he is dangerous.
Me: Okay. Well, that's good to know. Have you ever talked to him about feeling like he's dangerous?
Student: Yes. One time. That time, I walk up to him and say, "Excuse me, sir. I think you are very dangerous man." Then.... I RUN. I RUN A FAST AS I CAN.
Me: ....
Student: It happened. I ran.
Me: You told your boss you thought he was dangerous, and then ran away from him?
Student: Yes.
Me: When did that happen? Do you still have your job?
Student: Today. It happened this afternoon.
Me: I see..... Did he fire you?
Student: I don't know. I tell you I ran. I will find out tomorrow.

Either this student doesn't understand the meaning of "dangerous," or he possibly may be looking for another job.

I Look Like Katie Holmes

A few days ago, I had a student that compared his face to Orlando Bloom. Today, a separate student compared himself to another handsome actor (notice how no one compares themselves to say.... Danny DeVito??)

Me: What action movies do you enjoy?
Student: I love the Die Hard movies. And The Transporter.
Me: Oh, I *love* those movies!
Student: Yes. Bruce Willis is good. And Jason Statham.
Me: Oh, yeah! There's not much of a plot in their movies, but they're exciting!
Student: Yes! You know, I look just like Jason Statham....!
Me: Oh, really (skeptical)....? You must be so handsome!
Student: Well.... not *exactly* like him.
Me: Oh? What part of you looks like him?
Student: Just my hair.
Me: Oh... so, you're bald?
Student: Yes. Just like Jason Statham.

So, I guess it's okay for me to compare myself to Katie Holmes, since we both have eyelashes?? I like this logic.

My Mom Has A Beard

Oh, Jin O... what am I going to do with you?

Me: Can you please describe your mother?
Student: Okay. She has average build. She has average height.
Me: Okay, good. Anything else?
Student: She has a round face and is middle aged. And a beard.
Me: A beard?
Student: Yes.
Me: Your mom?
Student: Yes....
Me: She has a beard?
Student: Yes.
Me: SHE has a beard?
Student: (getting annoyed) YES.
Me. ..... Okay, then. Your mom has a beard.

Alrightythen.

I Got a Little Bored

I just read my friend's status about his ESL students complaining that they were bored already.

I'm kind of embarrassed to say that I was the bored one while teaching today. I got down to my last student and found no motivation to teach pronouns.

So, I did what any teacher would do: I challenged my student to a game of "Guess What I'm Holding in my Hand" to teach him how to describe things. It was quite successful, and he got a kick out of it too.